Taking Back What's Rightfully Mine
I have a confession to make: I love to spend my free time looking up different quotes on Pinterest that make me feel good. I am that annoying person that goes nuts for those typical, basic quotes on coffee mugs. Why am I mentioning this to you all? More or less because I have one quote I wanted to focus on here:
“Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”
I KNOW everyone has heard this in some form at some point in their lives, but what does that mean and what does it have to do with me in particular?
I recently paid a visit to my therapist. I couldn’t be more thankful for her words and her wisdom. During this last visit, my therapist had asked me if I degraded myself as much outside of our sessions as I do inside of sessions? Before I go on, I need to clarify what she meant by degrade. I don’t say things like “Oh, I’m so ugly” or “I hate myself because (insert reason here)”. Nope. I say things such as “I know I’m so weird” or “I’m crazy, but…” and that’s where she would call me out. Any time I would try to call myself weird or crazy, my therapist would stop me and simply say, “Stop. You are not weird and you are not crazy. You need to love yourself more.” I left that session heartbroken with tears running down my face because I never truly realized how unkind I’ve been to myself. I haven’t taken the time to give myself the love and care I deserve. I have been too busy seeking love in places where I’m not going to receive the love I need.
SO, how does this apply to the aforementioned quote? I’ve decided that I am tired of feeling so much sadness. I want to feel joy. I want to put so much energy into myself and feel so overwhelmingly fulfilled. With all that being said, I’m not going to become “happy” overnight, but I am also not going to continue to search for happiness and love in places I know I won’t find it. The search for happiness is a true journey of finding oneself. I give so much love away to others, but never give myself love in return. I am my number one priority. I am worth so much more than I give myself credit for. I want to be so busy caring and loving everything about ME and what I have to offer that I don’t have time to envy what others post on social media. Is this going to be easy? Of course not. I know there will be obstacles thrown in front of me that are going to make me give up on myself, but unlike all the other times I have tried to focus on purely me, this time is different. This time, I refuse to give up. I refuse to stop improving myself and my personal happiness even if trials come my way. From this point on, I am taking back what is rightfully mine: MY happiness, MY self love and MY self confidence.
